Hi there. I decided to make a video lesson on Dutch vocabulary and sayings, related to love, in Dutch: de liefde. If you are dating a Dutch girl or boy, then this lesson can be helpful to you. And if you’re not, I wouldn’t skip it, because you never know.
Do you know the expression to have “butterflies in your stomach”. If I am correct, in English it means that you have some nervous feeling, but anything could be the reason. In Dutch it is only related to the feeling you have when you are in love. We say “vlinders in je buik hebben”. If you have this, you are “verliefd” (in love). And to be in love with someone, is “verliefd zijn op iemand”. For example: Peter is verliefd op Karin. Peter is in love with Karin.
But “verliefd zijn” not necessarily means, that you are in a relationship “een relatie). It could be, that it is not “wederzijds” (mutual). This is an important word, that you will hear a lot. The Dutch are curious. If you start telling you met someone nice. They want to know it immediately: “is het wederzijds?”
If it is “not mutual”, we can say “het is niet wederzijds”. Or we say “onbeantwoorde liefde” (unrequited love). And a typical result is “liefdesverdriet” (lovesickness).
But, let’s keep this lesson positive. No worst case scenarios!
Let’s say you like someone. Typical expression: “je bent voor iemand gevallen”. Now what could you do to get a date “een afspraakje”.
First option: ask him or her to go out with you. In Dutch we say “iemand mee uit vragen”. For example, if Peter asks Karin to go out with him; then the correct phrase is Peter vraagt Karin mee uit. Peter zegt tegen Karin: “wil je met me uit?”. Remember that phrase.
Option 2: let’s say it is not someone you know. You are in a bar and you see someone nice. You have to come with a good one liner. That is what we call in Dutch “de openingszin” (the opening sentence). It is very common a Dutch guy here comes up with something original. Typcially some kind of wordplay joke. It is SO common to be original, that actually… Take my advice, if you see someone nice, forget about being original just say “Hoi, ik ben…”. That’ll work as well.
But, what if you don’t have the guts. Well, you could wait for “Valentijnsdag” (Valentines Day). We celebrate it in the Netherlands as well. That’s a moment when many Dutch write Valentijnskaarten (Valentine’s Day Cards) anonymously. I’m actually interested to know from you, because I could not find too much information about it; if sending cards anonymously is also the habit in all other countries; or wether it’s just the shy Dutch. Write it in the comments here in youtube.
Option number 4: Dating-sites and apps. We have them in Holland as well. The four biggest dating sites at this moment: E-matching, Lexa, Relatieplanet and Pepper. Oh yes, and for those who still think, you can trust the Dutch: there is also this one: Secondlove. No need to explain.
Now let’s say that during the date, you find out the other person is really nice. Now you have a job to do. We call that “versieren” (which literally means decorating). It is like seducing, but not necessarily aiming at sex. For that reason I am not so sure if “to hit on someone” or “to make a pass at someone” are translations with exactly the same connotation. Give me your ideas.
Good to know is the difference between “flirten” (we have that word in Dutch now) and “versieren”. Flirten is much more sophisticated, like giving hints or smile. “Versieren” is already an activity.
Also, if you use “versieren” in the perfect tense, it means a positive result. So: Gisteren heeft Peter Karin versierd. If you hear that, it is “wederzijds”. So either they had a one-night stand or they have now “verkering” (a relationship).
I won’t explain adult terminology here. You may be interested in that. Not in this video. Perhaps later, but I will need to study the youtube guidelines first. However: one word you need to know, because that is where it all starts with: “een kus” (a kiss).
Girlfriend and boyfriend. In Dutch it is just “vriend” and “vriendin”, the same word as normal friends. So it depends on the context.
“een vriendin” = just a friend
But “mijn vriendin”, if you say that as a man, you are talking about your girlfriend.
The Dutch usually want to be clear wether they are in a “verkering” or not. The terminology “aan” (on), or “uit” (not anymore) is used frequently. Just like a light bulb. We can say “het is aan” or “het is uit”.
Typical phrase to start a relationship: “wil je verkering met me?”.
And a typical phrase to end it: “Ik maak het uit”.
But we end this lesson of course with the most important phrase: “ik hou van jou!”, I love you.
Good luck with dating the Dutch !
I hope you liked the video. If yes, I’ll be very happy if you give me the thumbs up.
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Veel liefs en tot ziens!
